Is it really a mistake you are making?
Well, if you are to believe the culture and belief systems that you have been brought up with, then yes, it most probably is / was / will be a mistake and yes…that means that all those awful beliefs that you hold about yourself and how wrong you are and how much of a failure and how unlovable you are correct too….!
Sadly, if you believe this, then every time you make a mistake, you will feel like a failure, you will reinforce the deep seated belief, created in childhood, that there is something fundamentally wrong with you.
Most of us have this belief, although it is stronger for some more than others, but generally we all tend to hold this within our psyches. This is due to our schooling, our parents and care givers and the way that society treats people who make ‘mistakes’.
But…..
How about, if I told you that this is simply an idea, or better yet, a perception… there is actually no such thing as an absolute truth when it comes to ideologies, cultural views and belief systems…and you will know this already, if you know someone from a different culture, religion or even country …..mostly they will hold differing opinions and view the world in ways that may seem strange to you. So, what is an absolute truth for you, is not for them and vice versa. It is not that you are right and they are wrong, or you are wrong and they are right, it is simply that you perceive things in a different way, based on your culture, country of birth and the belief systems of those two.
Knowing that the ideas that have been instilled in you, are not ‘absolute truths’ means that you now have the opportunity to free yourselves from these ideas, thoughts and beliefs and choose new or different ideas, that feel better and serve your higher purpose and your true self.
One area is the idea of mistakes or errors. The word error comes from Latin and means to wander or to stray.
So let us imagine that you wander / stray into a situation you have never been in before and you make a decision to behave in a certain way…if the consequences of your actions return a negative reaction from the people around you or yourself, you will naturally assume that you have made a mistake / error.
If you wander or stray and the consequences are favourable from the people around you or yourself, you assume you have not made a mistake.
Remembering that everyone sees the world through their own eyes and is influenced hugely, by their own culture and its belief systems, this means that what may be a mistake in one culture may not be in another….therefore, it is all about perception, as there is not really such a thing as a ‘true or absolute mistake’.
Let us now take this even further and look at the idea that mistakes or errors as they were originally known, are simply the exploration of new possibilities…you wander off the path, you stray off the path, to see what is on the other side.
When you arrive on the other side, you may think to yourself…’mmm, this doesn’t look good’…in which case you will make a mental note, not to do it again…and this is great, because you tried something new, which is part of your human evolution, you realised you didn’t like it, still part of your human evolution and you chose not to do it again…now you have evolved.
However, Western society may still condemn this as a mistake and you may be punished for it and if you are not punished by a higher authority, you may well punish yourself for the perceived error/ mistake.
This then creates a repeating pattern of self-loathing, anger, never feeling good enough and this very often leads to destructive behaviour, because we feel disempowered and out of control.
The destructive behaviour may be centred on ourselves or on someone else, but it comes from our feeling that we have done something ‘ wrong’ and that we are therefore in someway ‘wrong’. That’s a pretty horrible way to feel.
The other problem arises when we try something new, realise that it doesn’t make us feel good and continue to do it nonetheless and this can also be a reaction to feeling like we are ‘wrong’….”well if I am wrong anyway, I might as well be wronger”!
So, how about this……how about deciding that nothing you have ever done in your life was / is or will be a mistake….?
What about deciding today, to say…I am a human being, I am here to experience humanity in all its forms and I am here to evolve and to grow.
So, every decision I make and every thing I do, I shall see as an opportunity to grow and to evolve.
I shall stop listening to the voice in my head and the voices of others that tell me I am ‘wrong’ when I choose to stray / wander off the path to have a new experience.
I shall come back from my experience with a knowledge that I didn’t have before and I shall use that knowledge to grow and evolve.
Daily decision
Every day as you brush your teeth, shave or put your make up on, silently say in your head.
“EVERY DECISION I MAKE TODAY IS A CHANCE FOR ME TO GROW, EVERY DECISION I MAKE TODAY IS A CHANCE FOR ME TO EVOLVE. I CANNOT BE RESPONSIBLE FOR OR CHANGE HOW OTHERS CHOOSE TO PERCIEVE MY DECISION, BUT I CAN BE REPSONSIBLE FOR HOW I CHOOSE TO SEE IT.”
All the love
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